Inspiring families to find their happy place.

Accepting our childrens’ beautiful imperfections

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.

Parenting isn’t easy.

Ouch. This month has been rough.

I have seriously been beating myself up for the imperfections storming through our house.

Nonetheless, I’ve been doing a lot of meditating on this topic of imperfection and it’s why I chose it as this week’s intention to focus on.

It’s timely for me.

My absolutely favorite parenting book in the world is The Conscious Parent. There is so much wisdom in that book that I’ve read it and reread it, and I’m doing so again now. Definitely buy it; do not borrow it. You can get it on your e-reader, too, which I think would be better so you can refer back to bookmarked pages anytime you need it!

In it, the author, Dr. Shefali Tsabary, writes about where we are coming from with our children. Our issues are their issues, basically.

I hate that.

She then goes on to say that we need to accept our children just as they are.

So for me, I need to accept that one of my girls is loud, boisterous and demanding.

The other is shy, anxious and afraid of conflict.

It’s our job as parents to help them find the middle way of both extremes.

If I didn’t have twins who were raised the exact same way, I would not realize that these quirks that make them unique are just their true nature, a personality they were born with before I even laid eyes on them in the hospital.

I am not responsible for their behaviors. I only have to help them control them.

So, as we consider this theme of embracing imperfection this week, we must consider the imperfections of others — especially our children. We must embrace not only what they do right, but also what they do that is anything but.

So whatever your child’s common mistakes are — embrace them, honor them, respect them, give them your full attention.

Do not berate them for those imperfections — at least not this week.

Do not punish them for those quirks — at least not this week.

Do not fear those personality blemishes — at least not this week.

Do not try to change your child or those lovely little traits she was born with — not this week or any week.

Let’s celebrate the positive in our kids and turn them into beautiful affirmations of love and respect such as these:

Once I started this list, I couldn’t stop so here are a few more without images:

  • My child is kind.
  • My child is creative.
  • My child is analytical.
  • My child is passionate.
  • My child is full of great energy.

I decided while planning for this post to create affirmation cards for my girls. One was included above but I plan to create more.

How about you? Please feel free to turn your child’s imperfections into wonderful, beautiful affirmations as well. I’d love it if you would share any affirmations you come up with in the comments so I don’t feel completely alone in needing to make lemonade from lemons this week.

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